Friday, October 31, 2014

Gurudev, please explain in detail about Saama, Daama, Danda and Bheda (referring to the four ways of persuasion or dealing with people).

Click on the button Bookmark and Share to share Sri Sri's divine knowledge topics.

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar:
These are four ways of persuasion:
When someone does something wrong or misbehaves with us, what do we do? First, we gently make them understand how they are wrong. Many people unknowingly commit a mistake, so once they understand that they are making a mistake, they do not repeat it the next time – this approach is called Saama (meaning to explain by persuasion).
You cannot blame someone for a mistake that they have made unknowingly. So Saamameans to explain to the other person the mistake he has committed and to make him aware of it.
Now, even after explaining the mistake, if they still go on repeating it, then what should you do? Then you should forgive them by saying, 'See, you realize that this is wrong, is it not? I forgive you, now do not do it again'. This is Daama.
So, at first, you make them aware without making them feel like a culprit. If they repeated it, then you make them feel responsible for the mistake, and forgive them.
You should never make a person feel like a culprit in the very first time of committing a mistake unknowingly. See, if you create guilt within them by blaming them at the very first instance, then they will never improve their ways. They will never be able to gain awareness and overcome their wrong ways.
So after Saama comes Daama.
Suppose even after doing all this, they continue to repeat their mistakes, then you need to adopt the approach of Danda (punishment). And if punishment also does not work, then one needs to adopt the way of Bheda (meaning to change one’s behaviour towards the other person).
Then you tell them, 'Okay, since you continue to repeat this mistake even after my telling you so many times, I am not going to behave the same way with you anymore'.
This will make them feel a pinch of guilt about what they have done, and they will understand the pain of their mistake.
Danda is the last measure one needs to adopt. When someone does not listen even after doing everything else, then you need to pick up a stick to make them understand. Someone who does not understand and improve their ways even after explaining and persuasion, will only understand through punishment (Danda).

Dear Gurudev, if your heart wants something really bad, but your intelligence comes to a conclusion that it is not possible, which should we trust?

Click on the button Bookmark and Share to share Sri Sri's divine knowledge topics.

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar:
You have said your answer in your very question.
Your heart wants something which your head knows is not right. Do you know why? It is because your heart thinks, 'Maybe I will get some pleasure out of it'.
A little bit of temptation does that. In those moments, you should follow your head.

Gurudev, for a Yogi this world is a penance, and for a Bhogi being alone is a penance. Can there be life beyond penance?

Click on the button Bookmark and Share to share Sri Sri's divine knowledge topics.

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar:
Penance makes us strong.
Yogi is all alone in the forest and he feels happy. But when he is amongst people, and they pounce on him, pull his leg, or cause him pain, yet if he does not get angry and remains calm in his mind, then he has won.
For a Yogi being alone is very easy. But for him to be comfortable and happy amongst people is a penance and a skill, which is necessary.
Similarly, a Bhogi is very comfortable in a crowd. But if he gets depressed being alone, then eventually he will be unhappy being in a crowd too. Why is this? It is because there is no fulfilment inside.
If you cannot be happy with yourself, then how can you be happy with others? 
That is why, when you spend some time in silence, and sometime by yourself, you become so content from inside. Then you will not long for attention, or for some praise from others.


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...