Wednesday, November 12, 2014

Gurudev, when there is a conflict between two things and both feel right, then how do you choose?

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Sri Sri Ravi Shankar:
Relax. If there is confusion, relax. The right thing will come up by itself. Choose whatever gives happiness in the long term. Even if it is not so pleasant in the short term, it doesn’t matter. What gives you happiness temporarily but results in suffering in the long term, then that is not a good option.

Gurudev, love is a divine quality. It is said that love can liberate us, but it is seen that love actually binds us. Marriage is also seen as a bondage. So how can this bond be beautiful?

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Sri Sri Ravi Shankar:
When there is no selfishness in the relationship then it is beautiful. If there is willingness to sacrifice in the relationship, then it becomes beautiful.
Look at the relationship of Shri Ram with his brother Bharat. It was such a strong bond but both of them were willing to sacrifice anything for the other. Such a relationship where there is no selfishness, is a beautiful one. In such a relationship, there is lot of love and peace.

Gurudev, is it more important to keep oneself happy or others around happy?

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Sri Sri Ravi Shankar:
See, both are important. If you have become a saint or a sanyasi(one who has renounced everything), then you need to keep others happy, but if you are a samsari (one leading a worldly life), then you need to keep yourself and others happy.

Like a cycle has two wheels, you need to balance both. If you are only trying to make others happy, then you yourself will become sad and if you are sad, then how will you keep others happy?
If you are only interested in keeping yourself happy, then the people around you will be sad and if they are sad, how can you stay happy? Both are dependent on each other, so take the middle path and be happy and keep others happy.
Take time out for yourself. Take care of your own health too and then you can keep others happy. You mustn’t be adamant to always get your way. Sometimes you need to give in and keep others happy too. You must not always insist that only what you say or believe should be followed. No, adopt the middle path. Sometimes listen to others, and sometimes also follow what you feel.

Gurudev, if peace is our nature then what makes violence arise?

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Sri Sri Ravi Shankar:
Weakness or fear is the root of violence. The fear of extinction or rejection causes violence. Stress causes violence. Stress is also a kind of weakness. Stress or tiredness and no strength is weakness and causes violence. Lack of awareness of one’s strength causes violence.

You can think about what are the things that cause violence and you can make a whole list.
Attachment also causes violence. Extreme passion without wisdom can cause violence.
You hear all these stories in the newspaper. Two people who initially love each other and they later become so violent to each other, that they kill each other. Haven’t you heard of these things?

All over the world, you hear of people who have fallen in love and then later stabbed each other. It’s unbelievable. So wisdom is essential. Just love or passion is not enough.

Love without wisdom is misery. If you don’t have wisdom and are not balanced, then that can cause violence. But if you are totally dedicated to something, then that is different. Then you don’t lose your wisdom.
Nowadays when you read the newspaper or switch on the television, every day, you get some such story, and there may be many more such incidences that go unreported.

Q: Gurudev, Can you please speak about Kaal Bhairava?

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Sri Sri Ravi Shankar:
Kaal Bhairava is the Lord of Time. Time itself is the Divinity.
Do you know what the vehicle of Kaal Bhairava is? It is Shwana (Dot). Shwa meansYesterday or Tomorrow, Na means Not. So, Shwana means, not yesterday, nor tomorrow; which means Now.
So, where does Kaal Bhairava reside? In the now.

Q: Gurudev, Does acquiring power and authority - professionally and spiritually, give one the power to misbehave with one’s parents at home? Do you approve of such people?

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Sri Sri Ravi Shankar:
No, not at all. Both the parents and the children need to understand and be careful in this situation.

For parents, I would advise them not to be overly strict with children. Remember what has been said in our scriptures. In the Nitishastra and Dharmashastra, it is said, ‘Aprapti shodashe varshe putram mitram-vad archaret’.

When you child becomes 16 years old, you should be like a friend to them. So give some freedom to your children, and do not try to overly control them in everything that they do.

But do not give too much freedom also. If you give them too much freedom, then in the future they will only blame you for their own conditions.

It is like this, if you hold the reins of a horse too tight, the horse will not be able to run. And if you keep it totally loose, then the horse will run wherever it wants to. So adopt the middle path here.

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